A blood drive in honor of Jessica and Kelli will be held on Tuesday, July 14, 2009, from 2pm to 7pm at the Conference Center, 2nd Floor, at SIU-Edwardsville.
Blood supplies are dangerously low right now, so the Red Cross is asking for all available donors to come out and support this cause.
For more information, please email me at kimberlydorsey40 at gmail.com.
Second Annual Dinner/Dance Fundraiser for
Jessica and Kelli Uhl
Sunday, July 19, 2009
6pm to 11 pm
Knights of Columbus Hall
1 Columbus Plaza
Collinsville Illinois 62234
Tickets are $20 each
RSVP to:
Kim Dorsey
9 Harvest Point
Collinsville, IL 62234
618/344-5531
Proceeds benefit the Jessica Uhl Scholarship at SIU – Edwardsville
and the Kelli Uhl Scholarship Fund
Webster defines sorrow as “a deep distress, sadness, or regret especially for the loss of someone or something loved.”
My definition of sorrow is an emotional pain that is so intense, you feel as if your soul is being torn apart and you don’t know if you will live another day. On Nov 23rd, 2007, I entered into my definition of sorrow due to Jessica and Kelli being tragically killed in an automobile accident.
I thought I knew what sorrow felt like but I guarantee that I really didn’t know until the girls died. I lived in a state of sorrow for quite some time. I constantly thought:
“Why did my girls have to die?”
“Could I have somehow prevented it?”
“GOD, how could you be so cruel to take these young, beautiful girls away from me, their mom, step parents, siblings, all other family and friends? How!!!!”
“What did they do to deserve this!!!”
“It isn’t fair!!!”
“I don’t know if I can live without them, I feel such sorrow and pain, someone please help me, it hurts so damn much!!”
“Why, why, why!!”
Above are questions and thoughts that continually went through my mind for a long time. Do I still ask these questions? Yes, sometimes I still do but not as often because I now have hope.
Webster defines hope as “to cherish a desire with anticipation.”
When did I start feeling a sense of hope? I really don’t know, I think it has been a combination of things that really started the day the girls passed away. At the beginning, the sorrow overshadowed all other feelings. But from day 1 there were so many people providing support, condolences and prayers. The day after there were people bringing us food, offers to mow the lawn, you name it, people were willing to help in some way. It was pretty incredible and in the midst of all of the sorrow, there was a spark of hope. When the wake took place, I was overwhelmed by the number of people that showed up to pay their respects. There were lots of people that I knew and yet so many that I didn’t know, lots of Kim’s friends and so many of the girl’s friends. The funeral itself was emotionally brutal, all that sorrow crashed down, but once again, so many people turned out and it was truly appreciated. Donations, both financial and spiritual, started coming in from friends, family, co-workers and complete strangers. Hope made an appearance again.
Time went on, Christmas, New Year’s Day (Kelli’s birthday), my birthday, Mother’s day, Jessica’s birthday, Father’s day, times where there should be joy and there was but the cloud of sorrow still existed. During all of this, Kim told me about this idea she had in putting together a benefit to celebrate the girl’s lives and to raise money for a scholarship fund and for the Collinsville cheerleaders. The spark of hope grew again.
On July 13th, 2008, the benefit took place. The turnout was incredible. It was indeed a celebration of two wonderful lives cut short. But as I sat there and watched and listened to people, hope started burning so much brighter. To hear the positive impact Jess and Kelli had on so many people overwhelmed me and made me realize that even though they were physically gone, their spirit lived on in everyone that was there. I had a song played in memory of the girls, “Who You’d Be Today”, by Kenny Chesney. If you listen to the words of the song, it hits really hard and you can’t help but cry. But yet, at the end of the song, he sings about hope, the one thing that gives him hope is that he will see the person again someday.
How do I define hope?
Hope is seeing all the support and good that people have done in honor of the girls. From the trees that have been planted, plaques that have been placed, to fundraisers (thanks Ruby Tuesday) and the benefit. Hope is knowing that I will indeed see my girls someday.
GOD Bless You.
Brian Uhl
Where Were You When….?
Funny how your memory works. Some things can be crystal clear, and others are a hazy cloud. Do you remember last Thanksgiving? What you wore? Who you sat by? How about dinner last night? Breakfast this morning?
One memory I’ll never lose is November 23, 2007. What started as a fabulous fun-filled day turned into the biggest nightmare of my life. And I can remember every last detail.
It was the day after Thanksgiving. My family was preparing for a family photo shoot since everyone was in town. The bathroom at my parents’ house was a hustle and bustle of curling irons, makeup, and voices. We moved furniture, met the photographer, checked ourselves one last time, and became models.
The girls buzzed in during the ruckus right when we were ready. I remembered what they wore, jokes we made, who stood by whom…everything. Our small family poses were done a little after 11:30, and the girls were ready to head home. Jessica had to work, and drop Kelli off at home on the way. Hugs and “I love you”s were shared along with the ‘Drive safely”. Who knew the last good-bye was going to mean forever.
We all got on with the day shortly afterwards. Brian was called into work, my sister-in-laws went shopping, and I went for a walk. I remember thanking God for the beautiful weather, the awesome family time, and the many blessings we had. And then about 4:00 the walls started crumbling.
My brother mentioned there was a big accident on the highway (he had been called into work also) and wondered if Brian knew. Little taps of anxiety began in my brain. Nah.. everyone left HOURS before anything happened. Surely everyone was safe. But I called Brian just in case.
Then at 5:00 the awful news came in. Brian had just heard from Kim, and he called me, weeping with such anguish in his voice, to tell me. And the world stopped. The surreal became my reality.
The rest is all seen in black and white: Telling my parents. Calling Brian’s parents in Kansas. How to tell Tony and the other kids. Hours of stunned silence and unrestrained sobbing. Waiting for it to be a bad, bad, joke. But the punch line never came.
The following 6 weeks are a blur. I remember the visitation, the funeral, and lots of tears. I don’t remember much else until after the New Year.
So, where were you when….?
I am sponsoring a tree in Collinsville’s Festival of Trees. The tree will be in memory of Jessica and Kelli. Please bring an ornament to the vigil and we will use it on the tree. If you want, attach a gift tag with your name and why you chose it.
To mark the one-year anniversary of their deaths, please join us on November 23, 2008, for a candlelight memorial at Woodland Park in Collinsville, Illinois, at 6pm.
Woodland Park is located on Pine Lake Road, off Beltline Road in Collinsville.
Have you ever thought how much an impact a person’s voice has on you. When you hear a person’s voice, you can almost instantly tell if they are happy, angry, distressed, sad, etc. You recognize who people are by their voice. Voices are unique to each person, even when two people sound exactly the same, there are still enough differences that you can still tell them apart. Voices affect each and every one of us in different ways but they do affect us. My biggest fear is that I will forget what Jessica’s and Kelli’s voices sounded like and the impact they had on me. I still remember them but can tell my memory is starting to fade and it breaks my heart. However, I do have several camcorder tapes with the girls on them to refresh my memory of their voices. I just wish that I didn’t have to use them for that purpose. The other night Wendy and I were talking about what possession we would grab first in case the house was going to be hit by a tornado or if it caught on fire. The first thing that came to mind were the picture albums. They tell our life story with family and friends and include so many pictures of the girls. Along with those picture albums I would also be grabbing the camcorder tapes because without the sound of their voice, the pictures are not quite the same.
The first day of school this year was bittersweet. Jessica would have been a sophomore at SIUE. Kelli would have been a freshman, just starting CHS. I remember when Kelli first started 5th grade. The school combined the 5th and 6th grade classes from all the elementary schools into one building. She was so nervous, coming from a school where there was one class per grade. She knew everyone in that school. She made new friends, still hung out with the old ones, and excelled, just like I knew she would.
Jessica never had a problem making friends. We moved to Collinsville when she was in 4th grade. I remember her teacher telling me that she didn’t know Jessica hadn’t lived here all her life, because she had so many friends so quickly.
Maddy started 4th grade, and it’s her last year before she goes to the 5th and 6th grade center. She said she was nervous about starting school, because at the end of this year, everything changes. I think she’ll do fine. She, like her sisters, has a great personality and doesn’t have any trouble talking!
I’m still pinching myself over the turnout we had. Thank you again.
I’m still getting donations. It just blows my mind that people are so generous.
We do still have bracelets and magnets available for sale. You can stop by Tan Rio in Troy, or email me and I can get them to you.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I’d like to thank everyone who came to the benefit; who donated silent auction and raffle items; who sent donations to us; who bought bracelets and magnets; and who supported us in our planning. We’re already making lists for next year’s event.
We estimate we had over 350 attend. We raised a little over $10,000. Holy. Crap. At 6:45 we had a line down the sidewalk of people waiting to get in. We had to set up extra tables, but we didn’t run out of food. The Brooks and Dunn guitar went for $500.
It was a great party. Jessica and Kelli would have loved it. There was laughing, there was crying, there was dancing, there was fried chicken. The tables was covered with bright colored tablecloths. We used pineapples, big bright flowers, fish and pompons for the centerpieces.
Pics will be posted soon, I promise. I will update with the Flickr Link.
Saliba Photography generously donated their coverage of the event. Pics will be posted on their website soon, and I will update with the login information. All proceeds from purchased photos will go to Jessica and Kelli’s fund as well.
I am overwhelmed by the support that we have been shown. I cannot begin to express my thanks.
